Hola toditos!

The awful Texas summer heat and humidity is gone, and here are the beautiful, crisp, dry sunny days of autumn. What more tempting time is there to light up? I was tempted when the first cool days came on, especially because my boyfriend, who coincidentally quit the same day I did (May 16th, 2005), took up smoking again. He admitted one day that he had caved and smoked a cigarette at work. I think it actually happened before that day, because a few days later we were in the liquor store (the one we always go to when we do buy liquor once every couple of months), and the guy at the counter pointed to a pack of American Spirits with raised eyebrows, as if to say, "are you buying cigarettes today, too?" to my boyfriend.

It's okay, though. It's not the end of the world, and I forgive him. It's just a new test of my resolve, because naturally I am more likely to be tempted to smoke when I'm drinking, or having coffee, or finishing a dinner out, if my boyfriend (or anyone else I spend a lot of time with) suddenly starts smoking at those times again.

No matter what else happens, there's only one test of success or failure in quitting smoking. Did you smoke? And I succeeded, because I did not smoke. Not ever, since May 16th. I'm very happy about that.

It's been an incredibly stressful two months at work for me, and that might not be over any time soon. I had stopped exercising because of a knee injury, and I've been steadily gaining weight for the past three months or so, and now I'm back up to the weight I started losing weight from when I first went on an exercise kick back in April. But I have not smoked.

Another one of my co-workers invited me to start going to the gym with her during our lunch hours, and we went twice this week. I felt a lot better for doing that.

The weather is so beautiful, I really enjoyed the walk/run on Friday's lunch hour with a different co-worker. Looking toward exercise and seeking exercise partners makes it much easier for me to resist smoking. Also, hearing my smoker co-workers start to cough painfully with the onset of fall colds, I am reminded that it's a very good thing that I am not smoking.

Last weekend my boyfriend and I went camping at Garner State Park, which is absolutely beautiful, set at the base of tall, blue hills, and the campsites are blanketed in low, graceful trees. Deer, rabbits and foxes can be seen, and there's a very clear, cold, shallow river running through the campsite, the aptly named Frio River.

I appreciated not feeling caked in smoke, like I used to feel after camping. My boyfriend did a good job of only burning wood in the campfire, and we didn't have to sit too close to the fire all night, because the weather isn't that cold yet. I'm sure it didn't hurt that I wasn't smoking on the 3-hour ride to the campsite, and wasn't smoking at the site either.

So yeah, I just try to remind myself of these things, so that when cravings hit, I have some kind of mental defense. Because it is a mental game, these semi-physical cravings.

Have a beautiful fall and a very Happy Halloween!

Hola amigos,


It's 3AM on a Sunday morning. I just got back from a bachelorette party, which started at a hotel, went to two strip clubs, and ended at a hotel. I wanted to smoke more than I have in a long time, but somehow I resisted. I think I was only able to resist because asking to bum a smoke would be more trouble than resisting it (a good sign.)

Also, I know that if I smoke one night, it's almost guaranteed that I will pick up smoking again... and come back to a host of problems. Not the least of which would be the scorn of my boss(es).

Buenas noches, me voy a la cama,

Equis