7 years and counting...

I just stumbled on this old blog, and wanted to post an update to let any reader(s) know that I am still smoke-free after 7 years, 5 months, and 15 days, or something like that. I am definitely not counting the days anymore.

I do get tempted now and then. Fall weather, hot coffee, out-of-town socializing (places where people still smoke in public, even indoors) are all sentimental places for me. Fortunately, I am confident enough in my quit and far enough away from the grip of it that I can feel these longings, keep them in a happy memory lane place, and then joyfully renew my commitment never to smoke another cigarette again in my life.

My two daughters are more than enough motivation, but I think I had enough reasons to stay quit anyway.

Recently, my two brothers who quit successfully for years relapsed, to varying degrees. I sympathize, and I think they're back off smokes now, but this news merely strengthens my conviction that there is no justification for a relapse--the penalty is too high. I don't want to deal with the effects of a relapse, and that cigarette would taste terrible and make me feel gross and guilty.

So hooray for a successful quit. So many people have done it. You can, too!

I haven't thought about this blog in a long time, but tonight I found myself reflecting on how truly lucky I am that I quit smoking over four years ago now. The bonus has been that not only did I quit successfully, but so did my two brothers who live in Austin (within a couple of miles of me), and my husband and sister-in-law.

We used to be a family of smokers. I don't have many memories of my mom smoking; she quit when I was a young child. My dad smoked on-and-off my whole life, up until recently. I think he's been quit for about a year now. My older brothers smoked since they were young teenagers. I started smoking at around 14 years old and smoked almost continuously until May 16, 2005, 25 years old. My younger brother smoked from around the same age until he was 24. He and one of my older brothers quit in March 2006 and haven't looked back.

There were several overlapping years in which 5 out of 6 of us smoked. We would get together for holidays, sporting events, reunions and the like, and everyone but my mom would crowd onto a porch or huddle outside an events center, puffing away. Now and then we would comment on what a shameful situation it was. It was a terrible habit that we bonded over and reinforced in one another. I remember with some horror now all the times my mother complained that we would flick our cigarette butts into the yard without even thinking of cleaning them up, or fill an ashtray and never empty it.

Almost all of my friends smoked, too. I was fortunate in that the months leading up to my quit brought a shift in my social life, away from smokers--I moved out of the house I rented with 3 other girls, all in college, 2 of which were smokers, and into my own apartment. My then-boyfriend (now-husband) smoked at the time, but quit in August of the same year I quit. I started a job in 2004 in which smokers were the minority, and for the first time I really saw that smoking was giving others a negative impression of me and holding me back professionally. Now, several years later, I have very few friends that smoke. I didn't intentionally stop socializing with smokers, it just happened naturally.

It's heartening that the culture is changing for the better around me. Austin passed a smoking ban in 2005 that has effectively eliminated smoking from restaurants and bars in town. This has removed a big temptation and I think it has been a positive influence on the health of citizens generally. Several other US cities have enacted similar laws.

My own micro-culture has changed completely. Now it is very rare that I am exposed even to second-hand smoke. I am out of touch with the cost of cigarettes. I am sure that days and even weeks pass by without my thinking about smoking.

This isn't to say I'm never tempted to smoke. Occasionally my husband and I find ourselves reminiscing about smoking, particularly when the weather turns cool, or we're sitting out on a balcony, porch or our new deck--places where the romantic smoking memories remain. Sometimes when we go out and other people are smoking, we are momentarily tempted. We went to a music festival last year in which I was more tempted than I have been since I very first quit, but I couldn't bring myself to smoke, knowing I would undo all the good I've done over the past few years. And I knew I couldn't get away with smoking just one, so I didn't.

As of tonight I have been off cigarettes for four years and two months. I am also 9 months pregnant. Several years ago, I wondered if I would be strong enough to quit smoking when I got pregnant. It was one of my reasons for quitting when I did--knowing that someday I wanted to have children. I had a nightmare (common in pregnancy) a few weeks ago about going out and smoking and drinking, only to realize halfway through that I was pregnant and had inflicted untold harm on my child. Imagine how relieved I was when I woke up and remembered that I didn't do any of those things, and haven't since I've been pregnant. My body has been a healthy place for my child to grow in, and I am very grateful for that.

I feel very blessed to have an almost entirely non-smoking family now. My parents are moving to Austin soon, so we'll have all of the non-smokers here in town. My younger brother and his wife have an 8-month-old, and I love knowing that he has grown up so far in a completely smoke-free family. He and my daughter will know a world in which family doesn't smoke, and family is right here for them.

My older brother who still smokes is also considering a move to Austin. I can't help but think that the momentum of our family's success in smoking will affect him, too, and that moving here would be the impetus for him to quit successfully.

If we've turned around this bad habit as a family, what can't we accomplish?

Still smoke free...May 16, 2008 marked 3 years!

I heard some good news on NPR during my evening commute today: fewer people are dying from cancer now, and the number has steadily declined since 1992 (when the number of cancer deaths peaked.)

The report I heard on the radio credited the decline in lung cancer deaths to the fact that fewer of us are smoking these days.

Hooray!

It's funny how cravings can hit you so long after quitting smoking. Last night I was overindulging at a wine-and-cheese party with my female co-workers, only one of whom is a regular smoker. One of my other co-workers who quit smoking two years ago, but still smokes on occasion, was smoking, too. I was momentarily tempted to light up, even now, almost 2 1/2 years into my quit.

All of my past quits failed when I thought I could get away with smoking on occasion, so I know that it's out of the question for me, regardless of what other people do.

When those brief moments of temptation strike, here's what I think about:

1. I know I would go back to smoking all the time if I smoked even one.

2. I would hate to have to either hide it, or explain to people in my life that I was smoking again. This goes for my family members, especially my brothers who have also been quit over a year.

3. Cigarettes were damn expensive when I quit - I don't even want to know how expensive the habit is now, even if I could afford it.

There are many other valid reasons to abstain from smoking, but those are the most salient for me, for whatever reason.

A close 4th would be that I know I would have to quit again when I get pregnant, which I'm planning to do in another year or two. I would hate to find myself unexpectedly pregnant and smoking.

So onward I continue, happily smoke free...

These posts are fewer and further between, but I'm still here, alive and kicking and smoke free. It's been over two years now. Every now and then I reflect on how different (and how much better) my life is now; how I feel healthy and unencumbered, and how far away my life as a smoker seems.

I know that people do cave in at this point, and even further down the road, in weak moments and complacency. It does happen, we're all human, but I sincerely hope that I can continue to resist the urge to smoke cigarettes. The reward is so great. Good examples of successful quitters abound. There is no better time to quit or stay quit than now.

Wow, it feels like forever since the last time I posted here. Have no fear, I am still happily smoke-free.

After many, many false starts and failed attempts, I have finally made it 3+ months into a serious health and fitness kick. As you might imagine, I feel terrific. My weight is down at or below what is was when I was a smoker, and my body is immeasurably healthier.

Plus, over the past *almost* 2 years, my group of friends has shifted to non-smokers. I have had the delight of hosting a party where no one smoked; this is a first for my family and friends.

Just wanted to chime back in and tell the world that I am still on the wagon, still enjoying life as a former smoker.

My best to all the ex-smokers out there!

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